Final, yes. I think I know what you mean. It changed things. I think a lot of my reluctance to write comes from wanting to always be true in what I write, whether it's fiction or not. And I feel like if I wrote about this, I couldn't do that. Either I'd please my audience and not be true to what happened, or I'd be true and produce something that wouldn't be all shiny and pretty. No matter how I do it, it wouldn't come out right. So I'll keep it in my heart. *sigh*