In talking about the religious conversion of Charles Colson, who was heavily involved in the Watergate scandal, Dennis Miller mused about how Jesus must feel when any scumbag criminal can start stalking him: "Oh shit, there's that asshole Colson again, wanting to turn his life over to me. TAXI!!"

And how weird is it that these people seem to think that reveling in the idea of torture and murder somehow takes away their sins and admits them into Heaven? If that's true, I really don't want to know what kind of people they'll be keeping company with. It never seems to occur to them that the very imagery is reprehensible, that pain and torture are not things to be glad about. (Gee, I wonder where the Current Occupant gets the idea that it's okay to torture prisoners?) The irony just whizzes right past them, damn near clipping their ears.

The Protestants and the Catholics? Are you sure you don't mean the Anglicans and the Catholics? 'Cause the Anglicans are also Catholics, just not Roman Catholics, and I find the idea of them getting back together far more plausible than the union of Protestants and Catholics. It's very difficult for me to believe that the likes of Jerry Falwell or Pat Robertson would ever consider joinng up with the Pope.

it was believed he was 5 foot tall, dark haired, dark skinned and a hunch back.

Ahaha. You should read Behold the Man, by Michael Moorcock. A novel about a crucifixion-obsessed time traveler, who goes back in time to fulfill his deepest wish and meet Jesus, only to find that the guy was a hunchback son of a slattern who'd slept with her whole village, practically, and who had the IQ of a large dog. Since there was manifestly nobody around who actually was Jesus in the biblical sense, he realized he had to take the role on himself. The book is a great read, very biting satire on religion in general, and the peculiar brand of blood-soaked Jesus fixation in particular. Quite a ride!