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Hey, everyone...

Thank you for the sympathy yesterday. I woke up better this morning. Still in some pain, but not the crippling kind I had yesterday. Spent most of the day in bed trying to flatten my back so it could rest. Watched a few movies, took some more meds in the evening, smoked a little weed. (Looks I can do that if it's just a little, and it helped.) Frodo curled up to sleep with me last night, which was nice.

Today I'm sore but can move around. Not sure if I can go out today but pretty sure I'll be able to do so tomorrow, so I can get things done. Which will be good because I'd had a separate outing planned for today, and things are getting backed up. (Being on the bus and limited in my ability to get around means I have to plan my outings ahead of time.) Luckily several things like my local market and the post office are within pretty easy reach, just a five-minute bus hop away. :)

So I'm on the mend, but I'm not gonna push it. I'ma make some breakfast, then take another pill and lie down again. With luck, I'll be able to get some stuff done this afternoon. Thanks again for the good wishes.

BIG (but careful) HUGS

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Okay, back now. Sorry about the freakout, but you guys are really the only people in my life I can cry to. Pathetic, I know. Thanks to those of you who were so kind about it. HUGS BACK

Since then:

1) HOLY SHIT, SCALIA'S DEAD.

2) I got weed poisoning on Thursday night. I was sitting at my computer, watching a movie and toking the way I usually do, which is taking a hit or two maybe every twenty minutes or so until I'm at just the right level. Usually when I smoke too much, I just end up falling asleep in my chair and then waking up and going off to bed, but this time... hoo, boy. After just a few tokes, I got hit with a MASSIVE wave of dizziness and nausea. Nearly fell out of the chair and ended up crawling to the bathroom, where I threw up a few times and then slept curled up next to the toilet, because I couldn't get up from the dizziness. I'm still feeling a bit of it - the dizziness, that is - but it's passing. I've only been able to eat some slices of whole wheat bread and drink seltzer, but I had a fruit smoothie today and I'm almost back to normal now. Gods, that was awful. The only other time that happened to me was a couple of years ago when I took a Vicodin for my shoulder and forgot to eat first. NIGHTMARE TIME.

3) I can't write that story I mentioned. It's just much too close to my emotions at the moment and far too painful for me to actually enter it now. I'm still taking notes, and want to wait until I get some distance before I try to write it, mostly because of the pain but also because I'm not completely certain it's actually a good story - it may just be a scream I need to scream. It's hard to tell for me, because so many of my stories come out of my own life and emotions, are ways to express things I'm feeling or grappling with in real life. But no, this one has to wait awhile. It's okay, though, because like I said earlier, it's a one-off, not part of High Contrast, so letting it go for a time won't affect anything else I'm writing.

4) HOLY SHIT, SCALIA'S DEAD.

5) Looking forward to John Oliver coming back tomorrow night. Anyone seen Samantha Bee's new show? She is SO awesome, and she's having a fucking great time with this. And MAN, is she vicious - it's utterly glorious. I think I may be crushing on her now that she's doing her own thing and not that Fox News Bunny character that she did on TDS, which was a wonderful caricature, but I didn't like her much. She's so much better as herself. <3 <3 <3

6) Drum Tao was on Stephen's show the other night. I have such intense desire to see these guys live. They'll be here in March, but I haven't got the money or anyone to go with. *sigh* Maybe someday...

Fullscreen that puppy and TURN IT UP TO ELEVEN.

7) I'm tired of writing angst. Somebody give me a prompt I can mess around with to take the taste of tears out of my mouth.

8) HOLY SHIT, SCALIA'S DEAD.


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So I got the confirmation from the county that my cash allowance has been approved. It's not as much as I'd hoped, but it's enough to make sure my utilities are paid each month, with a little bit extra so I can buy a few household things I've been sorely needing. This doesn't solve my problems, but it will give me a breather for a few months, so my mind isn't filled up with GODDAMMIT HOW WILL I KEEP THE LIGHTS ON? A hundred dollars a month sounds like chump change, doesn't it? But it's so much money to me that I started crying when I opened the envelope and read the notice.

*sigh* How did I end up here? I think I'll take some more cough medicine and curl up with a nice, yummy movie. I'm thinking O, which existence gabi_fics reminded me of today.

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Woke up with a sore throat, slight fever, etc. I've been downing chicken broth with cayenne, which is helping my throat and giving my tummy something to hang onto because my appetite is shitty, of course. I fucking hate summer colds.

I'm working on putting together a timeline for my C/Z fics. There aren't many of them, but I realized the other day that they're scattered around in both posts and comments, so I think I'll pull them together in a list, so anyone interested can follow the (somewhat) story. I'll also be posting them over at jacked_up.

Anybody interested in that? I think I may even have another one cooking on the back burner, as the last fic I did is begging for a partner. With luck...

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My Illegal Abortion

One woman's story of pre-Roe abortion, and her terrible fear that we're returning to that dark, deadly world.

Please read, and pass it on. I cannot express how important this is.

(I commented briefly with my story. It's on the first page of comments, if you're interested.)

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Gacked from samena.

Wow, I must be REALLY bored today/tonight.


( More useless shit about me than you ever wanted to know... )

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The sky is all hazed out now. Still no strong smoke smell. There've been helicopters overhead, flying south, all of them. The moon was orange last night, which I can't remember seeing since the really huge Malibu fires back in the 80's. Hot, dry and still. I opened the windows to get some air during the night, but there's no little air movement that it didn't really make much difference. Not even Casey wants to go outside - when I let her out this morning, she just turned around and came back in.

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Over the last couple of days, I've been getting lovely responses from you folks. Thank you for your concern! *hugs* But I really should clarify here that I am not in danger. The fires are many, many miles away from us, over roughly fifty miles of city land, built-up concrete city. We've even got skyscrapers! (They mostly live in a preserve we have set aside for them downtown, because we don't want them to breed with the other buldings and take over So Cal!)

So really, there's no need to worry about me or mine. I've been posting these updates because I thought it would be interesting for everyone to hear what the situation looks like from someone who lives a bit farther off than those who are actually in harm's way.

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Doing the dishes, I just looked up and realized the sunlight had changed. A pale orange pall has climbed about halfway up the sky and is touching the sun. My neighbour's parrots are irritable and restless.

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Spike was just here.

*picks up jaw*



I now have an elven cloak.



ETA: This cloak. With the brooch.

Late birthday present.


*still goggling*

Somebody stole one of my LOTR license plates. So I have to go to the DMV tomorrow and apply for a replacement. I'm lucky they only stole one, because if it had been both of them, I couldn't have gotten a replacement. And I love my F/S plates, damnit!

Oh Goddess, soooo sleepy. I only got about 3 hours sleep last night. Crawling off to bed now. Everyone I owe emails to - you'll get responses tomorrow morning, okay? For now, I can barely hold my eyes open.

Nighty night!