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RIP, Ron Glass

He knew the brownies were hash, because "I can tell by the way I feel."

Here's a story from the 80's reboot of The Twilight Zone, in which Glass plays... well, watch for yourself. You won't regret it.

I of Newton - The Twilight Zone, 1980's version

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RIP, dear Candy Man


“The decision to wait until this time to disclose his condition wasn’t vanity, but more so that the countless young children that would smile or call out to him ‘there’s Willy Wonka,’ would not have to be then exposed to an adult referencing illness or trouble and causing delight to travel to worry, disappointment or confusion,” his nephew, Jordan Walker-Pearlman, said. “He simply couldn’t bear the idea of one less smile in the world.”


Age 83, of Alzheimer's.

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Elijah's released a statement saying his remarks were "wildly misinterpreted." Yeah, I see that. The same quotes kept coming up, over and over, and they were oddly vague enough that I went looking to see if there was any more, because they sounded suspiciously like they'd been pulled out of context. Appears they were - Elijah says he was talking about shit he just saw in Open Secret, the documentary on the subject from 2015, and that he's never actually seen anything like that himself. I don't know how true that bit is (he could just be covering his ass), but I totally get that it was pull-quoted and misinterpreted. "Lesson learned," he ends his statement wryly. You can me both, sweetheart.

However, while I was looking to see if there was any more of that conversation floating around, I came across this in the Hollywood Reporter article about it:


[Corey] Feldman, the star of The Goonies and Stand by Me, spoke out in 2012 about his own experiences with sexual molestation. "When I was 14 and 15, things were happening to me," he told a British tabloid. "These older men were leching around like vultures. It was basically me lying there pretending I was asleep and them going about their business."

In his 2013 memoir, Coreyography, Feldman detailed how he and his then-best friend Corey Haim were subjected to sexual abuse during their years as Hollywood teen heartthrobs. During the filming of Lucas, Feldman writes, "an adult male convinced [Haim] that it was perfectly normal for older men and younger boys in the business to have sexual relations, that it was what all 'guys do.'

"So they walked off to a secluded area between two trailers, during a lunch break for the cast and crew, and Haim, innocent and ambitious as he was, allowed himself to be sodomized," Feldman continues, adding that the man is "one of the most successful people in the entertainment industry, still making money hand over fist."

Haim died of pneumonia at age 38 in 2010, his body failing him after years of devastating drug abuse. Feldman did not respond to a request to comment for this story.


Oh, FUCK NO. Just... NO NO NONONONONO. Corey Haim? Seriously? OH FUCK ME NO. Jesus fuck, I can't explain why this particular bit of information fucks me up so much, other than he just always seemed like the quintessence of sweet, slightly clumsy cute young kid to me. Hearing THAT SHIT happened to him? SPECIFICALLY that shit? And then he just assumed it was what was done? Because some UTTER FUCKER convinced him of that??? Oh, fuck me. I just... ARGH ARGH ARGH...


TIME TO CALL THE NOPETOPUS




How do I scrub this out of my brain? I can't get rid of the fucking pictures!!! FUCKING HELL OH SHIT FUCK....

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AHAHAA. GREAT video I just found on Youtube:

Graham Norton gets the opinions of Michael Fassbender and James McAvoy
on various pieces of slash fan art.


This is SO HILARIOUS. Graham really loves to trot out risque (and not so risque) fan art to flummox people on his show. He's done it to Daniel Radcliffe, and I would swear on the Goddess that he's done it to Elijah as well, but I can't find a clip of it on YT, damnit.

As someone who's done a little fanart and photomanipping (not to mention fics), I find these sections utterly wonderful. Daniel and Elijah were both gracious but clearly weirded out by it, poor dears. (My memory of Elijah was that he turned beet red but kept smiling and was quite calm.)

But this clip is the winner. Hugh Jackman, Michael Fassbender, and James McAvoy came on the show to promote X-Men, and it is really one of the best shows of Graham's I've seen. They are a fucking team, those three, so funny. And Graham did the fanart thing, this time it was original drawings instead of manips or fiction (ETA: Scratch that - I just watched again and they do talk about fics), and Michael and James are utterly hilarious as they deal with critiquing the artwork and commenting on the content. James is especially funny, his wit is so dry and lightning-fast.

I like these guys so much. A guy who can have fun with this sort of thing without being mean about it is a wonderful thing. Let's make more of them!


Note: If you hang on after the clip, you'll see their entrance in one of the little preview windows. Too. Much. Yum.

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Is it just me, or does Michael Caine always sound like he has a head cold?

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LOL. Just looking at the Netflix page for Elijah's film The Last Witch Hunter, and reading the user reviews. One guy talked mostly about Vin Diesel, but also added this little bon mot:

Elijah Wood plays the creepy little guy he's so good at.

AHAHA. Dude's clearly been keeping up with our darling's movies over the past few years. Man, I would never have thought that that sweet, serious little boy would gravitate towards playing weirdoes and freaks in all these weirdly unhinged movies.

*sporfle*

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I'm a big fan of Wil Wheaton. He's pretty damn cool. I read his blog, but I must have missed this...thing here.


Behold Wesley Crusher: Teenage Fuck Machine - A Kindle Book


Just so you know, that's a link to i09's, um, review of the "book". There's an excerpt. It's... yeah, the only term adequate for this is "fan fiction"**. Because there's just no way it could have gotten published otherwise.


From the article:

an edifying fable in which the Enterprise's resident rascal has a sexual awakening during a threesome with a barbed-penised cat man. Also, Captain Jean Luc Picard is walloped in the gonads.


If I had one of those benighted Satan's toys, I'd download this is a HEARTBEAT. Especially since the price is Just. So. Right.



**I hope it's obvious that I don't mean this as a knock on fan fiction. I do write the stuff, after all. But this thing is so emblematic of a certain type of fanfic that there isn't anything else to call it.
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You know, I find I've become very fond of Josh's performance in August. Tom Sterling is SUCH a dick, but it's Josh's interpretation of his massive dickery that I find so fascinating. From that first little CNN snippet - where he flaunts his dickishness with such casual arrogance it's amazing he isn't snapping gum - I'm just hooked by him, the way one is hooked by beautiful footage of a 10-car pileup. He's utterly mystifying, opaque, in his headstrong refusal to be real in any way, as if he thinks he can hold off the world through the sheer force of his steely eyes. It's really a wonderful encapsulation in miniature of everything that went wrong in that culture - good intentions, short-sightedness, delusions of grandeur, greed, overweening pride, rejection of reality, and tons and tons and tons of money, none of it real. Smoke and mirrors. Fumes, as Tom himself says. It's a gorgeous performance, one I'm sorry didn't get much attention.

But I would still like to know if that opening scene - the one in the nightclub restroom - was actually written that way, or whether it was an editing-room choice to "enter late, leave early", as the screenwriting edict goes. It's hard to say, though it works quite well. I don't think we really need to hear anything Tom said to that girl to know what a son of a bitch he is - her expression says far more than words could, as does his and the way he walks out. Jesus, such a BASTARD. Just beautiful.

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Here's a rather stupid and filthy idea, but I thought those of you who've been squeeing here might find it amusing...

( Alternative Casting Game! )

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Watched August last night. Uh...yeah. Seems Josh has been wilding on camera for a while now. Mm, mm, mm. Yummy, yummy man.

I'm getting a little jumpy at the way sex scenes are just THROWN at you these days, though. There doesn't seem to be a lot of buildup anymore. Two characters are having a conversation and then BAM, they're rutting like crazed animals. It's a bit...abrupt. I'm not exactly complaining - the slam of erotic energy I got when the film cut from a sexy look to full-on FUCKING!!! was certainly enjoyable. I'm just glad nobody else was in the room, because I made a pretty bizarre sound when that happened, LOL.

The film itself was surprisingly good. It's one of those Some Guy indie films, like Thumbsucker. Some Guy (or Some Gal) films don't really have plots so much as they have spans. Here's a guy, here's where he works, here are the people he knows. He goes places, he talks to people, things happen, and then it's over, but you haven't necessarily gone any great distance. They don't have plotting in the classic film sense, and they depend on the characters' ability to engage the audience, so the actors are really important.

This one is about a Zuckerberg type who runs a start-up, and right from the get-go I was rooting for him to get a massive bitchslap. Wow, he is a shit. And Josh played it beautifully, all smug manipulation and manic narcissism, spouting off that terminally annoying techie nonsense as if it actually meant something. Gods, the self-stroking horseshit was astounding. I wonder how hard Josh had to work to learn those lines, because there is absolutely NOTHING to hang your understanding on unless you actually do that kind of work. He might as well have been speaking in numbers: "Nine fifty seven eight hundred thousand? ZERO FOURTY NINE AZIMUTH MILLION SQUARE ROOT SKEWEY, ASSHOLE!!!" It really did sound like that - just mouthfuls of hot air, but he rattled it off like every word had import. That's something I really admire in good actors - their ability to inject real meaning into things they might not understand at all. I guess those "recite the alphabet as if you were breaking up with your girlfriend" theater games really do pay off.


( SPOILERS )

Yeah, this is one I'd definitely recommend if you're looking for things he's been in. It's a tour-de-force, too - he's in every single scene. The movie is completely about him, and yet it never really enters him. I mean, it's not terribly hard to figure this guy out, but he never gets explained. Know what I mean? I don't know if the filmmakers actually want to you to sympathize with him or not; it's really hard to say. But I enjoyed it, and I think you will, too.

P.S. The character's name is Tom Sterling. I find that incredibly funny, myself. It's a name seemingly crafted to put across every bit of his egocentrism and superficial charm.